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I.Me.My.Mine

guesswhoseblogisthis.blogspot.com


♥The Above Is None Other Than Me♥
I'm a messy perfectionist and a blind optimist. Loves Jesus Christ =)

♥30-bits of me♥
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 Just hover, don't click :P



Speak Up!

Statement of Independance


I'm free and my future is God's and my own. I treat my friends with care. I do what's right and that's that. For those I have hurt before intentionally or unintentionally, i ask for your forgiveness. I'm a new creation in Jesus Christ :)

Arigato
This blogskin is proudly presented to you by Anna May with an icon from The Fading Night.

Nangers
Won't hurt to click this :P

Aloha people!
Hi, i'm Nikita~ Feel free to browse around, don't be shy, yea? =) Toodles~ ♥
Dear Diary,
Emo.. emo.. emo..
Tuesday, October 24, 2006 @ 9:59 PM

Emo.. emo.. emo..



My blog is sooo dead... but i just changed the skin.. well, it's kinda moon-ey.. it's not my fault.. i'm doing it to complement the theme of this skin.. Frank Sinatra - Fly me to the moon.. lol



.....and my soul is sooo dead.. I'm just basically a living dead.. lately, i've been thinking too much.. too much even my own brain can't comprehend what the **** am I doing or thinking.. it is a very high level of thoughts.. I'm questioning myself... every single thing that I do and think.. wat am I doing it for?? for myself or for God?? Do ppl see God in me?? or a sensitive, childish girl?? wargh... it's driving me up the wall.. nobody understands me, understands why I do it.. that day my fren told me, how I am like.. i begin to wonder.. some part of it, is true but the other part, it is not..(I only do tat for my beloved frens, not anybody, okaaay) i'm trying my best to follow God's word... if i tell them that, will they understand or will they think I'm bullshitting or using God's name for my own glory?? then I start thinking negatively, and I think that watever I do was bad.. then I criticize myself.. LOL.. i'm thinking too hard and deeply.. I need someone to guide me in God's words... help me... I'm too self-critical, self conscious.. I take too seriously wat ppl say or think about me.. I'm doing this all wrong wrong wrong... absolutely wrong.. I must do to please God not people.. and I may hurt my frens.. but like wat my pet bro says (J) I shouldnt care wat they think, if I'm doing what is written in the Bible.. sometimes i think, am i interpreting and applying it correctly?? I'm soooo LOST~~~~.. where is my shepherd??? I must recheck my life, man.. =/



Thanks to zoe and jonny... for ur great advice..



Talking bout dreams coming true!! freaky eh? XD I dreamt that my fren will leave my books outside the door without informing me first.. and today it reli happened... she did tat maybe bcos of a small stupid dispute we had.. I just said tat, dun talk to me like that.. maybe she took it badly, i dunno.. i was just telling... haiz.. another hard day in my life.. then what will happen? just bcos of tat stupid no-brainer sms, a friendship has been ruined?? sumtimes i wonder, why everything I do, has to turn out so badly.. although i dun like sth, i must keep it to myself and everything goes well, I say it out only, it destroys everything... so how long must i keep it to myself?.. i'm just a mere human.. can't i voice out so tat we understand each other more... ??? haiz... feeling so bad lately... but will try to cheer up.. =) *trying



So, today i went for a Hari Raya dinner with my cousins... yeah, my cousins are malays.. mixed parentage.. hehehhe.. dun play play.. royal blood oh.. who cares.. duh.. okay, let me explain the super long family tree.. My mom's adopted mother's sister's daughter got hitched with a malay man.. currently, sum minister in Malaysia.. his name is Datuk Azmi Khalid.. he's not the famous 1 lar.. but still someone.. so his son invited us to his fully lavished house with a reli nice garden at the back of the house.. so you can see all those classy ppl, those malays who talk in english with one-kind-of-a-slang... even I dun talk like tat.. hahaha... rich ppl, wat to do.. no money, no talk ar.. LOL.. hahaha... I even saw a HAWT malay boy.. okay, this is off-topic.. the food there were not too bad but it was not too good as well.. haha.. u get a very magnificent view of KLCC here.. It's beautifool!! and i saw my aunt Lily and uncle Patrick that i've never seen for ages... They bought me 2 watches!!! isn't tat cool??? thanks!! =) A Casio Illuminator and Spirit.. time to reshuffle my wardrobe.. lol.. hahaha.. and was saying that, my aunt Pat who is the minister's wife passed away last year from leukaemia, it was reported in the news.. and just after a few month, the minister got himself a brand new wife.. the whole family was upset with his actions.. he got u noe who??? NORMALA SHAMSUDDIN, the tv3 lass... wait let me show u sum pictures... hehehe...



I'll upload the pics later, i cant upload it now.. duno why.. so do come back.. haha.. thx =)

HopAround!